What I've Learned in College So Far....

Fun fact about me: I have two younger brothers, and both of them are graduating! One is graduating from middle school, and the other from high school.  As the oldest child, I feel as if I have been the guinea pig on the spinning wheel of life; I just keep running, and hope that I am moving forward.  The realization that my brother, Sam, is making the great transition into college has primarily caused me to freak out, but also reflect on what sisterly advice I can impart to him.  I pray that my siblings can learn from my experiences as the first born, and make new mistakes instead of repeating mine.   Hopefully, I can pave the way for them.

So here it is, Samuel Paul.  Here is everything I wish someone had told me before I went to college.  Or, more accurately, things people did tell me, but I wasn’t listening. 

  1.Just because you’re in college does not mean you have to party.

I know the stereotype… the keg parties and wild ragers, living life on the edge, and the nightly shenanigans that always end in a haze.  The media, your peers, and even those you look up to will not only hold this to be true, but also celebrate it.  I hope you know that the values and goals attained in those four years at college extend far beyond beer pong.  Here is where you figure out the person God is calling you to be, and you decide where you want your life to go.  The partying lifestyle is fun and exciting, but it does not build your character. In fact, I guarantee that the happiness you find in true friendships, real experiences, and honest achievements will last much longer. Trust me… there are plenty of people who lead wonderful, exciting lives, without getting wasted.  Look for yourself in the activities you pursue, not in the bottom of your seventh beer can.  Think not of what “everyone else is doing,” but of what you are doing. Your best memories are the ones you actually remember. 

  2.Find common ground.

In college, you are given a fresh start.  And so is everyone else.  All of you are looking to find brand new friends, and it is easy to loose yourself in the masses.  Do not forget the things that make you happy; be it soccer, or Jenga club, or ridiculous music.  Keep in mind these interests, and join related clubs on campus, or in the area. Not only will you enjoy doing your favorite activities, but you will also meet other people who partake in those same hobbies.  It sounds so obvious, but I have encountered many a lonely person who was afraid to branch out.  Even if you don’t find something you enjoy right away, an open mind and a perseverant heart will lead you to good people.  Eventually, something will just stick!

  3.Work hard, and plan ahead.

True statement: college is harder than high school.  Truer statement: At first it will seem easier.  I was shocked at how few assignments I had in my first semester of college.  High school is all about busy work, with a large number of projects, tests, and homework to boost your grades.  This is no longer the case.  In college, the few test grades and assignments you do have are worth far more points.  You must consistently turn in high-quality work, because you do not get second chances. Teachers are not there to sprinkle fairy dust and rainbows on all of your work; they tirelessly expect the best from you.  Keep track of your assignments and allow yourself the proper time to get them done. At the beginning of every semester, I put all of my future test dates and project deadlines into my iPhone calendar.  This way, I can anticipate the busiest times and manage my schedule accordingly.  The college course load is a lot easier if you plan ahead. 

  4. …But also take a chill pill!

I don’t really have to tell you twice to enjoy yourself in college.  But seriously, do not get so bogged down that you have no time to relax. I have made the mistake of getting too busy, and it is miserable.  Plan your class schedule with time to spare.  I can guarantee you’ll need it.  I cherished the hour I got to watch Dance Moms every week because it was not only bonding time with my roommates, but it allowed me to rest for a while.  It is perfectly acceptable to take some time out to do things for yourself.  It will keep you sane.

  5. EXPLORE.

You will hear time and time again about how you “discover yourself” in college.  Part of this means trying new things.  Do things that scare you, but not things that endanger you.  Some degree of fear is healthy, and in expanding your comfort zone you will learn so much about the world around you.  Go to that program your school is holding about Japanese dance styles.  Take that class on silent film.  Eat a samosa.  (Find out what a samosa is.) Your school offers all of these different and unique opportunities in hopes that you will seize them. Education goes much farther than the number of credit hours you take a semester.  The more you know and experience, the more well-rounded and interesting you become as an individual.  Plus, the more information you intake, the more creative you will be! And we all know creativity is the spice of life. 

  6.You are what you eat.
   Ramen, cheap and easy, is a college student’s best friend.  Yet do you really want to be identified as “cheap and easy?” Really though, junk food is horridly enticing, but you will regret it later when you feel like crap and cannot focus.  The healthier your food choices, the better you’ll feel.  This directly affects how successfully you perform in school.  So think twice the next time you pop those noodles in the microwave. Real chicken is far superior to chicken seasoning, and your body will thank you.  Also, be grateful of your meal plan while you still have it; there will come a time when you must fend for yourself in the hungriest of Hunger Games. 

  7.R-E-S-P-E-C-T- Find out what it means to you.

As pervasive as the partying scene is in college, so too is the hookup culture.  I cannot stress this enough: AVOID AT ALL COSTS.  Sure, everyone likes to tell you it is all about having fun and none of it matters, but it does.  Feelings are involved in one way or another.  Maybe you hook up with someone who sees nothing of it, but deep down, you are feeding her insecurity.  Remember that every girl is worth talking to, and so is discovering the beauty that lies in her personality, her thoughts, and her sense of humor.  Hooking up is easy; it requires little self-control or respect of boundary.  But to truly know someone for who they are is a beautiful and admirable thing. Anybody can partake in the hookup culture, but it takes a very strong individual to see and want something above this.  I hope you are a man that can not only celebrate a woman’s choice to put her heart, mind, and soul before her body, but also live up to these standards as well.  Do not simply respect another’s limits, but set high limits for yourself. You will be much rewarded in the long run, I promise you.  Keep in mind that, like with the food example, you get what you are.  If you act like a gentleman, you'll end up with the woman of your dreams.  

  8.Take time for God.

Prayer not only improves your relationship with God, but is also helps you grow as a person. Write in a journal, go to church, go to other prayer services, run outside, do whatever makes you feel closer to God.  We all experience our spirituality in different ways, and the sooner you unlock the methods which best suit you, the better off you’ll be.  Think of it this way: going through life without God, you are only disadvantaged.  In closeness with Him, you better understand your call, and also have a great source of comfort in troubling times.  I have often read, “If God leads you to it, he will lead you through it.” Be patient, and be dedicated.  His plan for you will be revealed with time, but it will be a lot clearer if you are ready to accept it. 

  9. Do not get a tattoo on your ass.
      It makes literally no sense, and I cannot believe I even have to put that in here.  From afar, a butt tattoo will look like some sort of insect or disease.  Not only this, but it will merely serve as a constant reminder to how much an idiot you were.  Don’t be “that guy with the ass tattoo.”  You are much cooler than that.  Even a peace sign tattoo on your arm would be more acceptable.

  10. Share your talents with the world.

God made all people with wonderful and unique talents.  We are not the same, nor should we strive to be the same as everyone else.  Take pride in the things you do well, and look for opportunities to use your talents.  The more you share your gifts, the greater your skills will become.  These talents will lead you to innumerable opportunities, both in the business world and your personal life.  Make a name for yourself, and live up to that name.   People often look to me to make posters or paintings for them because they know I am artistic.  You can have that same success if you are confident in your abilities. 

Now go out, and set the world on fire! I believe in you 100%!

Love, your big sister,

Katie :)