Katie at the Airport

I legitimately have the worst track record with travel... Every time I try to leave Chicago,  my plane is delayed do to some bizarre occurrence, like a colonial women churning butter on the wing of an incoming flight. In looking for the positives, I tend to view this struggle as a sign from God that I should stay in Chicago. This is founded on the fact that I am only ever delayed in departure from this beloved city. Rarely, if at all, have I been thwarted in my attempts to get here. Personally, I'd rather just stay here, but my presence is sometimes requested in other areas of America. Indeed, i am beginning to feel like Eloise from those cute books I read as a child. Except instead of the Plaza, my domain is O'hare International Airport. Sitting here, wasting time in the airport, I have begun to reflect on all the ways I waste time in the airport. For your reading pleasure, I have compiled a list. These are the Top 20 Ways I Waste Time at the Airport:

1. Writing Blog posts about how I waste time at the airport 

2. Seeing how long I can go without getting up to go to the bathroom, get food, or buy a magazine

3. Discretely Listening to people's phone conversations 

4. Smiling at cute babies 

5. Picking a random word, like rutabaga, and saying it over and over again until it has no meaning 

6. Looking for the airport chapel

7. Conversing with the cashiers at those little newsstand places 

8. Watching the news. Well, more like reading the subtitles, since the tv is always on mute, until I can no longer take it. (This usually lasts around 5-51/2 minutes.) 

9. Determining if there are any secret scandals going on between the pilots and the flight attendants

10. Watching people's stuff while they go to the bathroom. ... Do I look like someone who is particularly trustworthy and reliable? (I suppose there are far worse things) 

11. Struggling with my mountainous mass of heavy things, once I give up on staying in my seat. (I trust no one.) 

12. Sending embarrassing snapchats of my face. ... Actually, I do that all the time 

13. Reading all the magazines at the newsstand, but committing to none of them. I'm a poor college student, ok! 

14. Reflecting on ways the airport could be more interesting. A movie theater, bowling alley, library, gym, and city hall would be great additions. (I basically live here anyway)

15. Looking for cute boys. 

16. Becoming frustrated at the lack of cute boys 

17. Buying strange foods I've never tried. Or at least considering the purchase of said foods 

18. Mentally rating the outfits of people walking by

19. Commiserating with my fellow travelers about our delayed flighted-ness*

20. Watching the sunset. And then rise several hours later, wondering how I spent so much of my life sitting in this slightly uncomfortable black patent leather chair. 

*don't judge my brilliant word creations 

Requirements of My Future Husband

Why yes, I am single. Therefore, like any single girl my age, I have compiled a list of attributes for which I wish for my future husband to embody.  I sincerely hope I am not horribly alone in my musings, for if this is the case, I will feel quite freakish and desperate.  That being said, I think it is important for girls to have a sense of the qualities that are needed of a good husband.  Otherwise, we just gamble about, consenting to the first schmuck that shows interest.  Indeed, in matters of both love and friendship, it is necessary to proceed with strong and wise judgment.  I recognize my model will be radically different from many others’ conceptions of a proper man, but alas, I am a radically different human being. I present to you now, live from my room, in the company of my slumbering roommates, the Soul-Mate Checklist

Mr. Right must...

1.   Be able to complete more difficult math problems, such as long division.  This is because I have the mathematical abilities of a shy fourth-grader in the remedial class.  (Bonus points for knowing Pre-Calculus and beyond)

       2.     Be willing to pose for portraits.  What can I say? I love to paint faces. And when I am bored, he better be ready to sit for a couple hours while I scrutinize every angle of his handsome brow. 

      3.     Enjoy ridiculous outfits.  Halloween will be a grandiose celebration in my future household.  My future husband must be willing to don the Hercules costume I so lovingly laid out for him. 

       4.     Accept and embrace chocolate.  A home without chocolate is not really a home.  In fact, it’s more of a prison. Nobody should be deprived of that sweet goodness.

      5.     Not call me “Dishwasher.”  I will have none of that.  My name is Katie, and I am a girl, NOT an appliance.  I will also not stand for making sandwiches, unless the request is prefaced with politeness.  

     

      6.      Do the yard work.  Because I have allergies, sorry. 

      7.     Be nice.  I like niceness.  It is good for the soul, and humanity as a whole.

      8.     Accept that fact that I sing. All the time. Singing in response is not required, but encouraged.  Mr. Right cannot say to me,  “who sings that song? … let’s keep it that way.” I hate that.

      9.     At least attempt at proper hygiene.  Fun Fact: Showering is a definite turn on. 

      10. Not be a cat person.  I mean, he can like cats, but we will never EVER in a million years own a cat.  I use my severe allergy to them as an excuse to mask my intense hatred of their feline maleficence. 

      11. Buy me Barbie toothbrushes.  Brushing one’s teeth is a staple of daily life.  It should at least be somewhat enjoyable.  Barbie makes everything more fun.

       12. Stay up until the wee hours of the morning for fun.  Obviously not all the time, but sleep is overrated. 

       13.  Be social.  I don’t do well with quietness; if I don’t get to converse with others, I go into convulsions.  Those quiet types are always a little shady.  (I realize this is grossly inaccurate and an unfair generalization.)

   

      14. Have his driver’s license.  … Because one of us might as well have those capabilities.

       15.  Not being abusive. I feel this is a necessary quality that many of fail to remember when considering the married life.  I think it would be nice to have a husband who doesn’t hit me, or call me a dumb cow.  Being non-abusive is one of the little things that make life great.

      16.   Saying “no” to drugs.  Except the ones the doctor prescribes.  I find it healthy to be with someone who likes me more than Crystal Meth.

      17. Knows how to read.  Literacy is extremely attractive.

     18. Has an understanding and appreciation of Harry Potter.  Because everybody should. 

    19.  Likes babies.  NEVER trust a guy who doesn’t like babies.  You know something is up if he tries to put your kid in the washing machine.  And turns it on.  And laughs manically.  Actually, at that point, I would say it is about time to call the police.

    20. Likes me.  At least a little bit.  It would be nice if he said “hi” to me every once in a while.

    

     This concludes my ruminations on important qualities in a man.  Feel free to add your own insights or experiences; I love to listen to others’ opinions! And don’t be afraid to make your own checklists of requirements; I found mine quite constructive. 

Whimsically,

Katie.

The Little Things

I can't drive a car, but I do drive 85 mph through life. Thriving off of activity, I lack the quietness to which others look forward. This is such a shame, because I feel like there are a million wonderful things I forget to be thankful about. God loves us in such big, magnificent ways, but he also woos us with the most delicate of details. For instance, flowers are ridiculously beautiful, and everybody knows that. But think about the fact that they also possess a wonderful aroma. It wasn't enough that they were visually engaging, God made them even more appealing. He draws us in through every sense. Time and time again, his creations go above and beyond our expectations. In light of this, I've constructed a list of intricacies I often overlook. Performing for you live from my laptop in the library, are my top 50 favorite little things.

1.Hearing the ocean in a shell. (I know there’s a logical explanation but it is still magical!)

2.Icing on cupcakes

3.Old-fashioned bicycles

4.Little kid’s laughter

5.Halloween. (It is just so fun!)

6.Sweet-smelling soap

7.Elevators with mirrors

8.Grand pianos in hotel lobbies

9.Light fixtures (ornate and underappreciated)

10. Cartwheels in the grass

11. Coloring books

12. Finding money in your pocket

13. Taking a shower after being in the cold

14. A blank journal and a new pen

15. The shadows of fancy gates

16. Squishing your toes in the sand on the first day of summer

17. Denim jeans

18.  Oreos

19.  Ferris Wheels

20.  Prisms

21.  Pinwheels

22.  When the sun shines on newly fallen snow, and it gets all sparkly!

23.   Otter pops (popsicles)

24.  Various world accents

25.  Big sleepovers

26.  Making shapes out of clouds

27.  Listening to little kids use their imaginations

28.  Using your imagination

29.  Blinking. (Well, have refreshed eyes is a nice feature of life. And now you’re thinking about blinking. And how that rhymed beautifully)

30.  Crossword puzzles

31. Fuzzy blankets

32.  Dimples

33. Hardwood floors

34. Eggs- there is so much you can make with eggs; it is crazy!

35. Stained glass

36. That feeling when your favorite song comes on

37. A good grade on the front page of an essay or test after much hard work

38. Getting your paycheck

39.Weddings

40. Making strangers laugh

41. Ice cold water after a workout, or being in the sun, or eating ice cream.

42. Parmesan Goldfish

43. Answering trivia questions right

44. Eating a delicious dinner after working hard all day.

45. Drop dead silence (but only sometimes)

46. Necklaces with a t on them. ;P

47. When priests or teachers unknowingly give talks on issues directly related to your life/problems

48.  Decorative scarves

49.  Tea sets

50.  Huge Libraries filled with endless books